When I cry at night, the only thing I can think to myself is...how can I seem so perfectly fine in the morning. Why do I smile like nothing is wrong ? And how does not one single person notice that I'm not okay ?

Behind my smile is a hurting heart. Behind my laugh, I'm falling apart. Look closely at me and you will see, the girl I am...isn't me.

• • To tell you the truth, I've just been avoiding everything.
    
    
    
  •  Behind my smile is everything you'll never understand.
    

    I didn't want to admit it. It was easier to lie. Hide the hurt and emptiness to smile instead of cry.
    Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense ? Well that's how I feel right now...I feel like I'm facing everything myself, with nothing but tears and a fake smile...
    

    
    

    I wanna get lost from my life sometimes, sit on the side and watch the world go by, I wanna get lost and I don't know why.  -Everclear-
    

    
    

    I don't know if I'm getting better or just used to the pain.