Thursday, August 30, 2012

demi KESELAMATAN Istri



PENTING !!!!!
Belajarlah dari pengalaman kecelakaan SAIFUL JAMIL yg MENEWASKAN istri tercintanya,
maka DISARANKAN kepada para suami yg SAYANG ISTRI untuk TIDAK MEMBAWA istrinya apabila mudik,
bawalah ISTRI CADANGAN atau ISTRI SIMPANAN atau ISTRI ORANG LAIN demi KESELAMATAN istri pertama anda.

Pesan ini disampaikan oleh Persatuan Suami Sayang Istri (PSSI).
 Sebarkan pd suami2 yg lain demi KESELAMATAN Istri pertama anda.

Boss mau nulis cek


Boss: Hari ini tanggal berapa?
Gue: 10.
Boss: Are you sure?
Gue: Iya.
Boss: Bulan?
Gue: September.
Boss: Di angka jadi berapa?
Gue: Nol Sembilan.
Boss: Taon?
Gue: Nol Lima.

10 menit kemudian...

Boss: Sekarang tanggal berapa?
Gue: 10.
Boss: Bulan apa? Mei, ya?
Gue: September.
Boss: Loh, tadi kamu bilang nol lima?
Gue: Itu taonnya.
Boss: Yakin?
Gue: Iya!
Boss: Tanggal berapa?
Gue: Tanggal 10, Paaak (mulai bete).
Boss: Yakin?
Gue: ........
Boss: Bener 10?
Gue: (gondok) Iyaaaaaaa... Bapak gimana sih kok tanya bulak-balik terus??

Cek yang berikutnya.. .

Boss: Tanggal berapa sekarang?
Gue ambil kertas, tulis gede-gede pake spidol : 10-09-05
Boss: Gak usah. Saya juga gak begok! Saya cuman mo mastiin!
Gue: Kerjaan saya banyak! Bukan cuman jadi tape recorder disetel bulak-balik!
Boss: No! No! (buang kertas, terus keluar ruangan).

20 menit kemudian dia masuk, siap-siap nulis cek lagi.

Boss: Tanggal berapa sekarang?

Cape deeeeeeeee.. . :p

(Sebuah kutipan dari 70 kisah kegokilan seorang Boss dalam buku MY STUPID BOSS, yang membuat anak buahnya hendak "mengakhiri" hidupnya)


Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass ...
It's about learning how to dance in the rain ...

cid:15.380967736@web32205.mail.mud.yahoo.com 
 
 



Appreciating What Is


In each stage of life, there are wonderful experiences one can savor and valuable insights one can absorb. Every new decade and, in fact, every new year brings with it wisdom, transformation, and growth, as well as ends and beginnings. Many people, however, believe that there is one age that eclipses the others. They expend energy trying to reach it and, once it has passed, trying to retain it. But wishing to be younger or older is a denial of the joys that have been and the joys yet to be, as well as the beauty of your life in the present. Holding on to one age can make it difficult to appreciate each new milestone you reach. Taking pleasure in the delights of your age, whether you are in your 20s, 40s, 60s, or 80s, can help you see the magnificence and usefulness of the complex seasons of your life.

Each new year gifted to us by the universe is replete with exciting and unfamiliar experiences.

In our 20s, we can embrace the energy of youth and the learning process, knowing it’s okay to not have all the answers. As we move through our third decade, we grow more self-assured as the confusion of our young adulthood melts away. We can honor these years by putting aside our fears of aging and concentrating instead on solidifying our values and enjoying our growing emotional maturity. In our 40s, we become conscious of the wisdom we have attained through life experience and are blessed with the ability to put it to good use. We are not afraid to explore unfamiliar territory or to change. In our 50s, we tend to have successfully navigated our midlife reevaluations and have prioritized our lives. In the decades beyond, we discover a greater sense of freedom than we have ever known and can truly enjoy the memory of all we’ve seen and done.

Try to enjoy the age you are at now, for each age presents its own unique wisdom to savor.

Your Fortune at Birth





From the Imperial Tung Shu comes this incredible poem of the four seasons ascribed to the legendary Yellow Emperor. From the poem can be obtained general indications of what life holds in store for a newborn baby. It is believed that depending on your season of birth, your life can be full of burdens or full of abundance. It all depends on which part of the Emperor's body you were born on. We present here brief predictive details of the four seasons poem for those wishing to investigate how, and at what stage of their life, they will enjoy the patronage and goodwill of the Emperor.

The incredible Chinese Tung Shu is filled with the most fascinating esoteric information relating to destiny analysis, as well as the meanings of signs, marks and symbols. One of the more tantalizing chapters relate to making a quick and general forecast of a person's life destiny, based on the seat assigned to us when we are born. This is based on the season of one's birth, as well as the time of birth i.e. the exact time when the baby is expelled or removed from the mother's womb.

Thus you first need to determine the season of birth - spring, summer, autumn or winter. The season of spring would be March, April and May; the season of summer would be June, July and August; the season of autumn would be September, October and November; while the season of winter would be December, January and February.

Next, you will need to determine your hour of birth based on the 12 earthly branches. This divides a 24-hour day into twelve time segments of two hours each, with each time segment representing one of the Chinese astrological animals. With these two pieces of information, you then need to look at the illustrations of the Yellow Emperor wearing the robes of the seasons - green robes for the spring, red robes for the summer, white robes for the fall and blue robes for the winter.

Look at the Emperor that corresponds with your season of birth, then locate on which part of the Emperor you were born based on your time of birth. Note from the time chart of the twelve time segments that each two-hour period has a special name. Locate the hour name on the Emperor's body and then check against the meaning given. For example, if your hour pillar is Mao in the season of summer, you look for the illustration of the Emperor in the summer season, locate where your hour name is located on his body and then read the meaning given under summer.

Use the table and diagram here to determine on which part of the Emperor you were born, then refer to the descriptions below to find your destiny.

 
 


Born in the Spring (March, April, May)

 

 
Cher

Born on the Emperor's Head

You will hold a high position in life. You have power and great intellectual capability. You are also blessed with wisdom. This person has authority, power and responsibility. Such a person must be well brought up and properly educated.


Tze & Wei

Born on the Emperor's Hands

Your attainments will be average and it is more beneficial if you work at starting your projects as the second-in-command and not as the leader. You can rise up high being the right-hand-man of someone powerful and wealthy.


Yu & Mao

Born on the Emperor's Shoulders

You will never be short of clothes on your back, which means you will always be able to make a good living. There will be no shortage of the basic necessities of life, including owning a home and property.


Wu

Born on the Emperor's Stomach

Your serious good fortune begins only in middle age when you will enjoy great good fortune in terms of the luxuries of life. There is plenty of food, clothing and all the material pleasures in this life.


Choh & Hai

Born on the Emperor's Girth

You will go through many changes in your life and as you get higher up the social ladder, you will transform a great deal. This transformation may be for good or bad and it is advisable that if you are in this situation, you should strive to change for the better and become more humble as you become more important in your work and life.


Shen & Shih

Born on the Emperor's Knee

You will have to travel a great deal in your life, so you can view this as good or bad depending on whether you enjoy travelling or not. Professionally, your life will be full of journeys. And like the wanderer, life is unsettled and transient.


Sen & Yiu

Born on the Emperor's Feet

This indicates that there will be two marriages in your life. This is especially true for women born into this position. For men, being born on the Emperor's feet suggests a restless nature that is not easy to please.



Born in the Summer (June, July, August)

 

 
Wu

Born on the Emperor's Head

This is an auspicious indication, since anyone born on the Emperor's head in the Summer will never have any worries. There are no obstacles and difficulties in this person's entire life. This also suggests a person who will have an excellent intellect, and who is good at strategic thinking and planning.


Tze & Choh

Born on the Emperor's Hands

This birth situation suggests that you will have more than sufficient money and business luck. Your good fortune improves with the years and you will attain great success during the later stages of your life.


Mao & Yu

Born on the Emperor's Shoulders

You are so lucky if you have this birth situation, since it brings you a lifetime of wealth and prosperity, lacking for nothing. You will amass a fortune during your lifetime, and in your old age, you will own plenty of properties. If you live an honourable life, you will be blessed with plenty of grandchildren and live to an old age.


Cher

Born on the Emperor's Stomach

This birth situation indicates there is plenty to eat and more than sufficient clothes to wear and to enjoy. There is good fortune luck from your late forties onwards. You will not have to worry about your old age for you will be well looked after.


Wei & Hai

Born on the Emperor's Girth

This birth situation suggests that you will have loving parents and be surrounded by noblemen and important people. What you make of your good fortune at birth will depend on your own efforts.


Shen & Shih

Born on the Emperor's Knees

It will be hard for you to be given the recognition for the work you do. There will be obstacles that can stand in your way and unless you can overcome this lack of recognition luck, by middle age, you will be exhausted.


Yiu & Sen

Born on the Emperor's Feet

This birth situation brings an easy life where everything comes easily, especially to those born male. Also, if you are of the male gender, it is likely you will have more than one wife. Women will find you irresistible. You will be blessed if you have a good attitude and a pure motivation.



Born in the Autumn (September, October, November))

 

 
Hai

Born on the Emperor's Head

This birth situation is especially beneficial for girls, as it indicates you will have a very comfortable and stable life with plenty of good fortune and prosperity luck. But both genders will benefit from the wonderful good fortune of being born on the emperor's head in autumn.


Tze & Choh

Born on the Emperor's Hands

This is an extremely auspicious situation of birth, as there is the promise of wealth coming from the four directions. Each time you travel, you will meet with a person of high standing who will help and assist you. You will benefit by going overseas to study or to work.


Cher & Wu

Born on the Emperor's Shoulders

This birth situation suggests that there is prosperity luck and you will become rich in your middle age. You will also have the help of your siblings, especially your brothers. You are blessed with many genuine friends.


Sen

Born on the Emperor's Stomach

This birth situation indicates that you will keep company with many clever people. They are people who excel in their career and their study and their presence in your life will inspire you to be ambitious. Happiness brings good fortune, so you must develop a happy disposition and be smiling at all times.


Mao & Wei

Born on the Emperor's Girth

You will enjoy an abundance of food and clothing during your middle age. Your sons and grandsons will bring you much happiness and contentment, so you have quite outstanding descendants luck. Those with this birth situation will benefit if they get married at a young age and start a family in their twenties.


Yiu & Yu

Born on the Emperor's Knee

You will need to work very hard during your early years and there may be some setbacks, but you are blessed with good fortune in later life. Those who have this birth situation should rejoice and never feel discouraged, as their success when they are older will more than make up for setbacks they may experience in their early years.


Shih & Shen

Born on the Emperor's Feet

Your whole life will be safe and peaceful and there is nothing to fear in terms of being hurt by others. If you are ambitious and have the determination to succeed, you can reach great heights professionally. Even if you do not reach the top, you will nevertheless be content with what you have. Therein lies the secret of your happiness.


Born in the Winter (December, January, February)
 


 
Tze

Born on the Emperor's Head

If you are born on the Emperor's head in winter, you will make a brilliant marriage. Your spouse will be a well respected person who comes from a highly regarded family background. You will have luxury in your life with enough food and clothes.


Hai & Wu

Born on the Emperor's Hands

You will have good family surroundings and there will always be occasions for rejoicing. You will be especially successful in your old age, when you have passed your 60th birthday


Yu & Mao

Born on the Emperor's Shoulders

You are blessed with exceptional descendants luck, so there are many sons and grandsons in your life. You will have some problems and setbacks during your growing-up and early career years, but you will enjoy good luck in later life. A great deal of your luck will be brought to you by your spouse and then by your sons and grandsons.


Cher

Born on the Emperor's Stomach

You are one person who is sure to enjoy singing, socializing and glamorous parties. And you have the luck to enjoy this lifestyle, as there is both prosperity and longevity in your life. It is however important for you to undertake some charitable work or donate to charity during your middle-aged years. This will bring you even more good fortune.


Yiu & Sen

Born on the Emperor's Girth

You will be blessed with exceptional good fortune in your old age when there is gold, asset accumulation and a thriving business in your family. You have the luck to grow old with someone you care for and love.


Choh & Wei

Born on the Emperor's Knees

You will have enough to eat and survive on, but little left over, and during your middle-aged years, there will be some truly trying times. It is incredibly vital for you to do charity and devote some time to caring for others. This will dissolve much of the negative chi that surrounds you.


Shen & Shih

Born on the Emperor's Feet

You should live away from your parents and grandparents, as it benefits you to have your own dwelling place. If you have your own home, you will enjoy good fortune. The further away you are from your ancestral home, the better it will be for you.

 
 

Beda cappuccino dan Espresso


Hampir dari kita semua pasti pernah minum kopi. Tapi tak banyak dari kita yang tahu persis apa beda kopi-kopi yang sering ditulis di papan menu Starbuck. Apalagi jika ada orang tua yang menanyakan apa beda kopi-kopi itu.:p

Biji kopi terbagi 2 jenis, yaitu jenis arabika dan robusta. Kopi arabika, yang berasal dari Ethiopia lebih bagus dan mahal daripada robusta. Pasar luar negeri banyak meminum kopi arabika. Sementara
penghasil robusta nomor 1 dunia adalah Indonesia. Biji kopi robusta yang berbentuk oval ditemukan di Kongo.

Ini saya bagi-bagi sedikit bocoran dari arti kopi-kopi yang siap minum. Kebanyakan berbahasa Italia tsb:

Kopi hitam, merupakan hasil ektraksi langsung dari perebusan biji kopi yang disajikan tanpa penambahan perisa apapun.

Espresso, merupakan kopi yang dibuat dengan mengekstraksi biji kopi menggunakan uap panas pada tekanan tinggi.

Latte (coffee latte), merupakan sejenis kopi espresso yang ditambahkan susu dengan rasio antara susu dan kopi 3:1.

Café au lait, serupa dengan caffe latte tetapi menggunakan campuran kopi hitam.

Caffè macchiato, merupakan kopi espresso yang ditambahkan susu dengan rasio antara kopi dan susu 4:1.

Cappuccino, merupakan kopi dengan penambahan susu, krim, dan serpihan cokelat.

Dry cappuccino, merupakan cappuccino dengan sedikit krim dan tanpa susu.

Frappé, merupakan espresso yang disajikan dingin.

Kopi instan, berasal dari biji kopi yang dikeringkan dan digranulasi.

Kopi Irlandia (irish coffee), merupakan kopi yang dicampur dengan wiski.

Kopi tubruk, kopi asli Indonesia yang dibuat dengan memasak biji kopi bersama dengan gula.

Melya, sejenis kopi dengan penambahan bubuk cokelat dan madu.

Kopi moka, serupa dengan cappuccino dan latte, tetapi dengan penambahan sirup cokelat.

Oleng, kopi khas Thailand yang dimasak dengan jagung, kacang kedelai, dan wijen


Regards,
Sani Teja
www.everydaymandarin.com

WORLD'S EASIEST QUIZ!
 
(Passing requires only 3 correct answers out of 10!)

1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last ?

 2) Which country makes Panama hats ?


3) From which animal do we get cat gut ?
 

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution ?
 

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of ?
 

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal ?
 

 7) What was King George VI's first name ?
 

 8) What color is a purple finch ?
 

 9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from ?
 

 10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane ?
 


Remember, you need only 3 correct answers to pass.
Check your answers below.

 
ANSWERS
 

1) How long did the Hundred Years War last ?
116 years

 

2) Which country makes Panama hats ?
Ecuador

 

3) From which animal do we get cat gut ?
Sheep and Horses

 

4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution ?
November

 

5) What is a camel's hair brush made of ?
Squirrel fur

 

6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal ?
Dogs

 

7) What was King George VI's first name ?
Albert

 

8) What color is a purple finch ?
Crimson

 

9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from ?
New Zealand

 

10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane ?
Orange (of course!)

 
 


What do you mean, you failed?!!
 
 
 
Me, too...!!! (And if you try to tell me you passed, you lie!)
Pass this on to some "brilliant" friends, so that they may feel useless too!
 

perasaan cewe

CEWE itu...
Kalau dia bilang :
•'Aku takut' = minta ditemenin
•'Masa sih?' = gw tau lo bohong
•'Terserah deh' = ngertiin dong
•'Hari ini pergi ga?' = main yuk!
•'Bukan salah km kok, salah aku' = sebenarnya sih elu
•'Ya'udah deh' = ga mau memperpanjang masalah
•'Kamu berubah ya skrg?' = gw kangen elo yg dulu
•'Cuma ga enak badan kok' = sebenernya minta perhatian lo
•'Ga ah, ntar ada yg marah'= pengen liat reaksi lo
•'Ga kok aku ga marah' = dah tau marah, nanya lg!!?
•'Sibuk ya?' = kapan ada wktu buat gw? :(

CEWE itu..
Isi hatinya :
-sakit tapi tetap tegar
-kecewa tapi tetap sabar
-hatinya menangis tapi tetap tersenyum
-bilang ga butuh, padahal butuh
-bilang 'fine', padahal enggak

Cewe itu..
Paling ga suka kalau :
»Cerita panjang lebar cuma dijawab dengan kata 'oh'
»Bosan dengar cerita cowo kita tentang mantannya
»Males disama-samain sm mantan dia

Note:
Perasaan cewe tuh lembut bgt, kalau sekali disakitin rasanya sakit bgt, apalagi kalau sampai terluka, makanya cewe suka nangis.

Cewe nangis bukan karna cenggeng tapi mereka punya perasaan. :'(

Cewe emg kalah kekuatan fisik sama cowo, tapi cowo kalah kekuatan hati sama cewe.

Save the girl! ;) Jaga betul² perasaan cewe.

Terusin ya !! Boleh kirim ke siapa aja, terutama cewe ya! Ke cowo jg boleh, biar mereka tau!!! :)
Biar saling jaga perasaan, satu sama lain. Apa lagi buat cowo ϓaήğ suka mempermainkan perasaan cewe.

GBU

Seorang suami yg sedang bekerja di luar Kota merasa tersanjung krn istrinya rajin mengirimi SMS & setiap SMS dari sang istrinya selalu diakhiri dgn GBU.

Pagi buta udah dapat SMS dari sang Istri: Met pagi yank,sdh mkn blum..? GBU.

SMS Pkl 10:00
Yank, lg sibuk ya.. GBU

SMS Pkl 13:00
Yank, sdh mkn blum ? GBU..

SMS Pkl 16:00
Yank, Lagi nyantai yach...GBU..

SMS Malam:
Malam Yank, I love you muach...GBU

Krn penasaran, Suami balas SMS: Yayank, kenapa sich setiap SMS-mu selalu diakhiri GBU?

Sang Istri menjawab: Gue Butuh Uang, tau..!!
If you care what people think about you, you will always be their prisoner.